Women don’t want to be pursued by men.
Now that I have your attention, let me explain what I’m really saying.
Disclaimer: Some of you may be offended because this goes against everything you thought you knew. Others will have a loud “yes” in their spirit because it clicks for them. And for some, you’ll agree but not totally because of semantics, but you’ll get over that.
Whatever your reaction, bear with me. This could get interesting.
First of all, the ground work.
Husbands are to love their wives like Christ loves the church. (Ephesians 5:25) This means Christ is our example of how a man should be.
Some of you may be thinking, “but, in the Kingdom of Heaven there is neither male nor female!” (Galatians 3:28) And I would say I agree with you. Men and women are all on the same level. However, this verse doesn’t mean we all have the same roles. Simply put, men are called to fill the role of man and women the role of woman.
When we look at Christ we see an example of what a man’s role looks like. When we look at His bride, the church, we see an example of what a woman’s role looks like.
Now that the foundation is laid, let’s continue.
Did Jesus pursue people?
Think about this question:
Is there anywhere in the life of Jesus, as seen in the Gospels, where He pursued someone?
To make easy for you, the answer is “NO”.
In fact, Jesus almost seemed to do the exact opposite. He would purposefully tell people to do things that are literally impossible like, “Be perfect like my Father in heaven is perfect.” (Matthew 5:48)
Then, He would teach in parables purposefully so some would get it and others wouldn’t. (Matthew 13:13)
Then, He would say the most offensive things and whole crowds would leave Him. Things like “Eat my flesh, and drink my blood.” (John 6:53)
And the crazy thing is, He didn’t seem to care. In fact, He even asked His disciples if they’re going to leave as well as if He was challenging them to do so. (John 6:67)
Everywhere He went, people were drawn to Him…
Jesus really sucked at pursuing people! And yet… here’s the kicker… everywhere He went people were drawn to Him. They wanted Him.
The disciples even told Him, “Where should we go? You have the words of life.” (John 6:68) In other words, “We have no clue what you are saying, but you make us alive.”
He made them feel safe even though He had just basically asked them to leave.
See that’s the secret.
Jesus was the most powerful, loving, and confident man they had ever met.
He wasn’t needy. He didn’t need someone to recognize who He was.
He wasn’t controlled by anything. Nothing anybody thought about Him controlled Him.
He didn’t need to have certain experiences to feel validated.
He didn’t promote Himself. In fact, He went against what we would do and waited 30 years before starting His ministry.
Instead, He loved life, was lead by compassion, and believed in who He was as a Son that had all the resources of heaven backing Him up.
And because of that, everyone was drawn to Him. They wanted Him.
By being who He was created to be, His bride has become obsessed with Him.
He makes them feel all lovey dovey… and, He makes them feel safe.
It is impossible to see Jesus who He fully is and not desire Him.
And He didn’t pursue us. He led us into the only decision we could make.
If you are a man that wants women to want you, stop being a passive pushover and follow Jesus’ example.
Stop being needy.
Stop being controlled by what others think.
Stop thinking you need to experience certain things to feel validated.
Stop promoting yourself.
Now it’s your turn!
Instead, love life, be lead by compassion, and believe in who you are as a Son that has all the resources of heaven backing you up.
Yeah. You’ll probably mess up. And, there is a good chance you’ll look like a fool at some point. But, if you’re enjoying life, it doesn’t matter.
Remember. Don’t pursue from a place of need. Instead, be a confident and powerful lover. Lead the woman to the only decision she can make.
Be the most powerful and loving man in the room and you’ll be able to choose practically any woman because that’s what a woman wants. Be certain of who you are and what you want. And this is only done by getting closer and closer to Jesus because He will reveal to you who you are!
Think about it. There’s a reason women are drawn to jerks instead of “nice” guys. The jerks come across as being certain of themselves and not controlled by anything. And it makes women feel safer than a “nice” guy that is controlled by everything people think, doesn’t take any risk, and doesn’t make any decisions.
But, instead of being a jerk, be a powerful and loving man!
To end this, here’s something to think about. Because Jesus is the most powerful and loving person in the universe, we, as the church, feel the most alive, the most loved, and the most safest when we are in His presence. And when you first saw that He was who He is, He didn’t have to pursue you, did He? You were drawn to Him. You get to be that to your woman.
It’s less about pursuing a girl than it is to invite her (by choosing her) into a dance where you’re leading. To some of you, you may still see that as pursuing and that’s fine… It’s just semantics.
By the way, I got this revelation by reading an article from a pick up artist. Then, I used Jesus as an example, because He’s the most manly man I know.
Let me know what you think below…